Are We Dating The Same Guy?
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Are We Dating The Same Guy? is a series of over 120 individual Facebook groups where women share red flags about individual men and check that he is not dating another person.[1] It is done by taking screenshots of a man's dating profile and posting it onto her city's designated Facebook group. Other users in the group will share information about the man.[2]
The group at times mocks men for their appearance.[3] The group has been criticised for the men not being able to defend themselves if lies are spread, having already ruined people's lives overnight.[2] Often times, members post pictures alongside personal information such as his name, which may infringe on that person's legal right to privacy. Lawyers have said these issues can lead to a defamation lawsuit.[4] If members tell the man that he's been talked about on the group, the "snitch" will be banned and be "exposed to the whole group".[5]
History[edit]
A male counterpart, named "Are We Dating the Same Girl NYC" was created for New York. It had mostly the same guidelines and rules to the original. When the original Are We Dating The Same Guy group found it, they said that it was disgusting and unacceptable for men to post screenshots of women's dating profiles, failing to realise that they were doing the same thing. Many people in the men's group were called incels.[6]
By country[edit]
Australia[edit]
In Australia, there are groups for multiple cities including Sydney, Melbourne, Adelaide, Perth, Brisbane and Rockhampton with many having several thousand members.[5]
In March 2023, the Adelaide version of the group, which had 7,000 members, was shut down.[7]
Canada[edit]
In 2023, a group was started for Ottawa by 37 year old Alicia Mercer. She previously was in a relationship full of "cheating and lies", which prompted her to creating the Facebook community.[4]
New Zealand[edit]
In New Zealand, the community is called "Do We Have The Same Boyfriend". The group gained 19,000 users in its first 24 hours.[8] A few cheating men have been discovered on the group, however it is not common. Netsafe, an online safety organisation of New Zealand, advises users of the group to familiarise themselves with the Harmful Digital Communications Act to ensure that posts do not lead to "harmful consequences".[9]
United Kingdom[edit]
The group for the United Kingdom was created in May 2022.[10] There are groups for London, Nottingham and Swindon. The London group has over 20,000 members as of February 2023. Many of the groups' users say that the groups are toxic, with one user stating "I think it couldn’t be more toxic. It’s potentially ruining a successful relationship or something that could be positive. The group is just asking for gossip. It’s a complete invasion of privacy."[11]
References[edit]
- ↑ "Are we dating the same guy? This Facebook group might know". Mashable. 2023-02-20. Retrieved 2023-06-13.
- ↑ 2.0 2.1 Lavinia, Emilie (2023-05-26). "The Dark Side of 'Are We Dating the Same Guy' Groups". Vice. Retrieved 2023-06-13.
- ↑ Mussen, Maddy (2023-02-08). "Are We Dating The Same Guy: what really happens in the divisive Facebook group?". Evening Standard. Retrieved 2023-06-13.
- ↑ 4.0 4.1 "Facebook groups warning women about online daters could be a risky business". Retrieved 14 June 2023.
- ↑ 5.0 5.1 "Inside wild 'dating' groups exposing Australian men". Retrieved 14 June 2023.
- ↑ Nast, Condé (2022-10-26). "Inside the Secret Facebook Group Where Women Review Men They've Dated". Glamour. Retrieved 2023-06-17.
- ↑ "Controversial Facebook group exposing men shut down".
- ↑ "'Do we have the same boyfriend?': Kiwi gals flood FB group exposing cheating men and it's wild". theedge.co.nz. Retrieved 2023-06-14.
- ↑ Casey, Alex (2023-03-27). "Inside the rise of Do We Have the Same Boyfriend Facebook groups". Stuff. Retrieved 2023-06-14.
- ↑ Curiously, Rebecca Lockwood-Content Creator / (2023-02-11). "Are We Dating The Same Guy group where women exchange notes on dates debunked". OK! Magazine. Retrieved 2023-06-17.
- ↑ Haughey, Lauren (2023-02-06). "Facebook group sees women exchange notes on dates". Mail Online. Retrieved 2023-06-17.
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