List of mondegreens

A mondegreen is a mishearing or misinterpretation of a phrase as a result of near-homophony, in a way that gives it a new meaning.

In English

• Gladly, the cross-eyed bear (in the hymn "Keep Thou My Way" by Fanny Crosby and Theodore E. Perkins, "Kept by Thy tender care, gladly the cross I'll bear").
• Calling Jamaica or Calling Chet Baker (in the song "The Sidewinder Sleeps Tonite" by R.E.M.: "Call me when you try to wake her")
• There's a bathroom on the right (in the song "Bad Moon Rising" by Creedence Clearwater Revival: "There's a bad moon on the rise").
• 'Scuse me while I kiss this guy (in the song "Purple Haze" by The Jimi Hendrix Experience: "'Scuse me while I kiss the sky").
• Run naked through water (in the song "Wanted" by Hunter Hayes: "Wanna make you feel wanted")
• We broke up on the docks that night (in the song "Tangled up in Blue" by Bob Dylan: "We broke up on a dark sad night").
• The girl with colitis goes by (in the song "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds" by The Beatles: "The girl with kaleidoscope eyes").
• Everybody needs some pushing from below (in the song "Brimful of Asha" by Cornershop: "Everybody needs a bosom for a pillow").
• Hold me closer Tony Danza (in the song "Tiny Dancer" by Elton John: "Hold me closer tiny dancer").
• Iris has the cholera, a thousand dumps a day (in the song "Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic" by The Police: "I resolve to call her up, a thousand times a day").
• See that girl, watch her scream, kicking the dancing queen (in the song "Dancing Queen" by ABBA: "See that girl, watch that scene, digging the dancing queen").
• Here we are now, in containers (in the song "Smells Like Teen Spirit" by Nirvana: "Here we are now, entertain us").
• He's dancing with the chicken slacks (in the song "Twistin' the Night Away" by Sam Cooke: "He's dancing with the chick in slacks")
• It doesn't make a difference if we're naked or not (in the song "Livin' on a Prayer" by Bon Jovi: "It doesn't make a difference if we make it or not").
• We're German (in the song "Jamming" by Bob Marley and the Wailers: "We're jamming")
• Slow motion Walter, the fire-engine guy (in the song "Smoke on the Water" by Deep Purple: "Smoke on the water, and fire in the sky")

Rap mondegreens are exploited by the singer M.I.A. in her single, "Borders". The singer plays on several mondegreens derived from reggae and adds her own (apparently) deliberately indistinct pronunciations of "beat 'em" and "be dum". Towards the end of the song, "peace" is exchanged for "peeps" on many lyrics websites: "we're representing peeps, let them play us on the FM".

A number of misheard lyrics have been recorded, turning a mondegreen into a real title. They include:

• The title of the animated Christmas show Olive, the Other Reindeer is a mondegreen on "all of the other reindeer", a line from the classic Christmas song "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer".

Non-English language

The title of the 1983 French novel Le Thé au harem d'Archi Ahmed ("Tea in the Harem of Archi Ahmed") by Mehdi Charef (and the 1985 movie of the same name) is based on the main character mishearing le théorème d'Archimède ("the theorem of Archimedes") in his mathematics class.

A classic example in French is similar to the "Lady Mondegreen" anecdote: in his 1962 collection of children's quotes La Foire aux cancres, the humorist Jean-Charles refers to a misunderstood lyric of "La Marseillaise" (the French national anthem): "Entendez-vous ... mugir ces féroces soldats" (Do you hear those savage soldiers roar?) is heard as "...Séféro, ce soldat" (that soldier Séféro).

The most well-known mondegreen in Brazil is on the music "Noite do Prazer" (Night of Pleasure) by Claudio Zoli: when he sings "Na madrugada a vitrola rolando um blues, tocando B. B. King sem parar" (At dawn the phonograph playing a blues, playing B. B. King nonstop), people often misheard it like it was "Na madrugada a vitrola rolando um blues, trocando de biquini sem parar" (at dawn the phonograph playing a blues, [people are] exchanging bikini nonstop).

A 2010 internet phenomenon in Hungary called Bikicsunáj, related to a mishearing of the German band Alphaville's song Big in Japan, became a mondegreen itself in Hungarian.

In literature

The title and plot of the short sci-fi story "Come You Nigh: Kay Shuns" ("Com-mu-ni-ca-tions") by Lawrence A. Perkins, in Analog Science Fiction and Fact magazine (April 1970), deals with securing interplanetary radio communications by encoding them with mondegreens.

In film

A monologue of mondegreens appears in the 1971 film Carnal Knowledge. The camera focuses on actress Candice Bergen laughing as she recounts various phrases that fooled her as a child, including "Round John Virgin" (instead of '"Round yon virgin...") and the famous "Gladly, the cross-eyed bear".

In the movie The Long Kiss Goodnight, one character is singing along to the song I'd Really Love to See You Tonight and misquotes one line as "I'm not talking 'bout the linen", before being corrected by another character that the words actually are "I'm not talking about moving in".

In the movie Angela's Ashes, while making the sign of the cross a young Frank McCourt says "In the name of the father, the son and the holy toast" in place of "In the name of the father, the son and the holy ghost".

In television

Mondegreens have been used as a story element in advertising campaigns, including:

• An advertisement for the 2012 Volkswagen Passat touting the car's audio system shows a number of people singing incorrect versions of the line "Burning out his fuse up here alone" from the Elton John/Bernie Taupin song "Rocket Man", until a woman listening to the song in a Passat realizes the correct words.
• A series of advertisements for Maxell audio cassette tapes, produced by Howell Henry Chaldecott Lury, shown in 1989 and 1990, featured misheard versions of "Israelites" (e.g., "Me ears are alight") by Desmond Dekker and "Into the Valley" by The Skids as heard by users of other brands of tape.
• An advertisement for Coca-Cola with Lime, in which a technician in the Coca-Cola laboratory rushes to his boss, saying, "Put the lime in the Coke, you nut," to the tune of Harry Nilsson's "Coconut."
• A 1987 series of advertisements for Kellogg's Nut 'n Honey Crunch featured a joke in which one person asks "What's for breakfast?" and is told "Nut 'N' Honey," which is misheard as "Nothing, honey."
• "Mondegreens" is the name of a segment on the Australian music quiz show Spicks and Specks (ABC TV).
• The Two Ronnies comedy sketch "Four Candles" is entirely built around mondegreens, including a taciturn customer's request for "fork handles" being misheard as "four candles."
• Mondegreens are a big feature of the Nickelodeon TV series Rugrats, in which the babies frequently misinterpret many big words as something else. For instance, ATM machine is heard as M&M machine, so they think money bags in the vault have "prizes" inside.

References

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