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Sounds Fake But Okay

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Sounds Fake But Okay
Sounds bars go across the picture in alternating colors of the asexual flag (black, grey, white, and purple). The background of the image is light purple. Above and below the sound bars are the words "Sounds Fake But Okay."
Hosted bySarah Costello
Kayla Kaszyca
Society & Culture
UpdatesWeekly on Sundays
No. of episodes164[1]
Original releaseJuly 31, 2017 – present

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Sounds Fake But Okay is a weekly comedy podcast that focuses on asexuality and aromanticism. The podcast is hosted by University of Michigan alumni Sarah Costello and Kayla Kaszyca. Each Sunday, Costello and Kaszyca "talk about all things to do with love, relationships, sexuality, and pretty much anything else they just don't understand."[2]

In November 2020, it was honored with the 2020 Discover Pods Award for "Best LGBTQ+ Culture Podcast".[3]


Costello and Kaszyca met when they were randomly placed as roommates at the University of Michigan. The pair immediately hit it off and became best friends. They did not discuss sexuality during their freshman year; neither Costello nor Kaszyca had fully figured out their identities yet. The summer after their freshman year, Costello "came out" as aromantic asexual through a Tumblr post which Kaszyca subsequently saw.[4]

After this, the pair discussed sexuality regularly. As Costello had never dated, she had many questions for Kaszyca about how relationships and dating worked. The conversations that resulted from questions like "why would you date someone?" and "what is the appeal of kissing someone?" became the inspiration for the podcast.[5]

Over the course of the podcast, Kaszyca realized that she was demisexual. Though she had begun to question her sexuality during her junior year of college, she did not come to terms with it until later. In episode 19 of the podcast titled Accepting Your Sexuality[6], Kaszyca emotionally described how the podcast and Costello had helped her discover new things about herself.[4]

Format and structure[edit]

Sounds Fake But Okay is released weekly on Sundays and episodes are about one hour long. The topics covered in each episode are still inspired by conversations and experiences that the hosts share.[4] Topics range from those that are more serious, such as asexual people's place in the queer community, to those that are more fun, such as discussions of fandom or pop culture.[2] The episodes are typically very casual, with Costello and Kaszyca frequently going off on tangents or switching topics mid-episode.[5]

Though the show generally only features Costello and Kaszyca, they are occasionally joined by guests. Guests have included people the hosts met at school,[7] members of Costello's family (both her sister[8] and her mother[9]), and other creators/activists in the asexual and aromantic communities. In episode 117, they were joined by Yasmin Benoit, a notable aro-ace activist and model.[10] In episode 132, they had Daniel Walker, the YouTuber behind the asexual channel "Slice of Ace", on as a guest.[11]

Media and events[edit]

  • In December of 2018, the podcast was featured in the annual Sex Issue published by The Michigan Daily.[4]
  • In June of 2019, Costello and Kaszyca appeared on the Star Wars podcast Friends of the Force: A Star Wars Podcast. The group discussed the Eleven-Thirty Eight article "The Asexual Awakens - An Interpretation of the Journey to Adulthood," and Costello put forth her headcanon that Luke Skywalker and Rey (Star Wars) are aro-ace.[12]
  • In October of 2019, the podcast was featured in a series of interview blogs written by the Asexual Visibility and Education Network (AVEN) for Asexual Awareness Week.[13]
  • In October of 2019, Costello and Kaszyca gave a talk titled "Creating While Asexual" at the University of Michigan Spectrum Center (community center).[14]
  • In February of 2020, Costello was featured in a series of interview blogs written by the Asexual Visibility and Education Network (AVEN) for Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week.[15]
  • In February of 2020, the podcast was featured alongside the aro-ace podcast A OK in an Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week article by them.[5]
  • In May of 2020, Costello and Kaszyca hosted a livestream fundraiser to raise money for the World Health Organization/United Nations COVID-19 Solidarity Response Fund. They were joined on the livestream by YouTuber Emi Salida, members of the Aromantic-spectrum Union for Recognition, Education, and Advocacy (AUREA), blogger Rose Sinclair, YouTuber Daniel Walker, comedian Eliott Simpson, podcaster Courtney Lang, activist Yasmin Benoit, and AVEN founder David Jay.[16] Ultimately, $4,111 was raised for the cause.[17]
  • In June of 2020, Costello and Kaszyca were featured on the movie podcast Bacon and Eggs: A Movie Lover's Podcast to celebrate pride and discuss The Hunger Games: Mockingjay – Part 2. In the episode, Costello and Kaszyca assert their headcannon that Katniss Everdeen is aro-ace. [18]
  • In August of 2020, Costello and Kaszyca were featured on the book podcast Something Old, Something Debut to discuss Alice Oseman's novel Loveless.[19]
  • In September of 2020, Costello and Kaszyca were panelists at the UK Asexuality Conference 2020 Edition. Costello spoke on the Aro Aces panel while Kaszyca spoke on the Romantic Relationships and Grey-Asexuaity & Demisexuality panels. [20]
  • In November 2020, Costello and Kaszyca, along with their podcast, were honored the 2020 Discover Pods Award for "Best LGBTQ+ Culture Podcast".[3]
  • On December 8, 2020, it was announced, via the show's official Twitter account, that Costello and Kaszyca would be releasing a book, focusing on "the aspec lens, asexual relationships, and how the aspec mindset can apply to every aspect of your life."[21] (Note: Aspec stands for "asexual and aromantic spectrums".[22]) The book is slated to be released in early 2023 and be published by Jessica Kingsley Publishers.[21]


  1. "Sounds Fake But Okay - Episodes". Sounds Fake But Okay. Retrieved January 5, 2021.
  2. 2.0 2.1 "About" Sounds Fake But Okay. Retrieved 2020-05-17.
  3. 3.0 3.1 Goldberg, Kevin (November 9, 2020). "Announcing the winners of the 2020 Discover Pods Awards". Discover Pods. Retrieved November 10, 2020.
  4. 4.0 4.1 4.2 4.3 "Francisco, Miriam (December 4, 2018). 'Sounds fake, but okay': Navigating asexuality on campus." The Michigan Daily. Retrieved 2020-05-17.
  5. 5.0 5.1 5.2 Kim, Michelle (July 18, 2019). "These Podcasts Are Paving the Way for Aromantic and Asexual Representation". Them. Condé Nast. Retrieved 2020-05-17.
  6. Sounds Fake But Okay. (January 7, 2018). Ep 19: Accepting Your Sexuality [Audio podcast]. Retrieved from http://soundsfakepod.buzzsprout.com/218346/938385-ep-19-accepting-your-sexuality
  7. Sounds Fake But Okay. (September 17, 2017). Awkward Flirting feat. A Friend [Audio podcast]. Retrieved from http://soundsfakepod.buzzsprout.com/218346/938398-ep-6-awkward-flirting-feat-a-friend
  8. Sounds Fake But Okay (July 22, 2018). Living Up To LGBTQIA+ Stereotypes feat. Sarah's Sister [Audio podcast]. Retrieved from http://soundsfakepod.buzzsprout.com/218346/938361-ep-43-living-up-to-lgbtqia-stereotypes-feat-sarah-s-sister
  9. Sounds Fake But Okay. (January 13, 2019). Parenting Queer Kids feat. Sarah's MOM [Audio podcast]. Retrieved from http://soundsfakepod.buzzsprout.com/218346/938340-ep-66-parenting-queer-kids-feat-sarah-s-mom
  10. Sounds Fake But Okay. (January 26, 2020.) An Interview with Yasmin Benoit [Audio podcast]. Retrieved from http://soundsfakepod.buzzsprout.com/218346/2572939-ep-117-an-interview-with-yasmin-benoit
  11. Sounds Fake But Okay. (May 17, 2020). An Interview with Daniel from Slice of Ace [Audio podcast]. Retrieved from http://soundsfakepod.buzzsprout.com/218346/3785249-ep-132-an-interview-with-daniel-from-slice-of-ace
  12. Whipple, Brad (host). (June 21, 2019). Asexuality & Relationships in Star Wars (with Sounds Fake But Okay Podcast) [Audio podcast]. Retrieved from https://anchor.fm/friendsoftheforce/episodes/Asexuality--Relationships-in-Star-Wars-feat--Sounds-Fake-But-Okay--Mumbo-Jumbo-e4dkiv
  13. AAW Interview – Sounds Fake But Okay Podcast [Blog post]. (2019, October 26). Retrieved from https://avenpt.wordpress.com/2019/10/26/aaw-interview-sounds-fake-but-okay-podcast/
  14. Sounds Fake But Okay: Creating while asexual. (n.d.). Retrieved May 18, 2020, from https://events.umich.edu/event/67046
  15. Aro-spec Awareness Week Interview #5 – Sounds Fake But Okay [Blog post]. (2020, February 20). Retrieved from https://avenpt.wordpress.com/2020/02/20/aro-spec-awareness-week-interview-4-sounds-fake-but-okay/
  16. Sounds Fake But Okay. (2020, May 2). 6 Feet of SpACE: An Aro / Ace COVID-19 Relief Fundraiser [Video file]. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PGUbEp0Z0c8
  17. soundsfakepod. (n.d.). 6 Feet of SpACE: An AroAce COVID-19 Relief Fundraiser. Retrieved May 18, 2020, from https://tiltify.com/@soundsfakepod/6feet/donate
  18. Edghill, Ethan & Carlin, Tyler (hosts). (June 25, 2020). "The Hunger Games: Mockingjay Pt. 2 (2015) - Featuring Sounds Fake But Okay" [Audio podcast]. Retrieved from https://baconandeggsmedia.podbean.com/e/the-hunger-games-mockingjay-pt-2-featuring-sounds-fake-but-okay/
  19. (August 31, 2020). "Something Debut: Loveless: feat. Sounds Fake But Okay podcast" [Audio podcast]. Retrieved from https://anchor.fm/olddebut/episodes/Something-Debut-Loveless-feat--Sounds-Fake-But-Okay-podcast-ei2k2s
  20. Asexuality Visibility and Education Network (AVEN). (n.d.). UK Asexuality Conference 2020. UK Asexuality Conference 2020. Retrieved October 22, 2020, from https://sites.google.com/view/uk-asexuality-conference-2020/home?authuser=0
  21. 21.0 21.1 "We have some NEWS ..." Sounds Fake But Okay/Twitter. December 8, 2020. Retrieved January 5, 2021.
  22. "Meaning of aspect - Queer Undefined". Queer Undefined. Retrieved January 5, 2021.

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